Dr. John Gottman's research found that a pivotal part of a healthy and long lasting relationship is a couple's sense of shared meaning: an explicit and implicit commitment to the relationship and believing your partner is there to support and understand your life dreams and goals (these life dreams and goals include an understanding of the relationship).
Read MoreHere is what I remember about her:
She ate salami, watched baseball on tv and swore fluently. She visited infrequently, even though she lived less than 30 miles away, and when she did come over, our house seemed to stiffen its spine.
When I conjure her image, I am not in the scene.
Read MoreThis blog is bound to contain a lot of material you probably have found in other mommy blogs: Tales of extreme fatigue, piles of laundry, leaky boobs, spasmodic tears, weight gain, baby blues, hormonal rages. If the subjects are familiar, however, it is because these maternal miseries are so universal. My hope is that by sharing my experience, some of you will find comfort in knowing that there are others out there who are muddling through this adventure and at times, feeling just as overwhelmed.
Read MoreWhile looking for a therapist, you may have noticed the "alphabet soup" that comes after each therapist's name. You're probably wondering what all of those letters mean. It may feel overwhelming to make sense of the many different professional backgrounds and credentials.
Read MoreDuring relationship expert John Gottman's research he has found 4 behaviors that failing marriages exhibit: criticism, stonewalling, defensiveness, and contempt. Gottman titled these behaviors the "4 Horseman of the Apocolypse" as they often signal that the end of the relationship is near if things do not change.
Read MoreThrough years of research, John Gottman has found that there are four major predictors of divorce: stonewalling, contempt, criticism, and defensiveness. These 4 communication styles are known as "The 4 Horseman of The Apocolypse" in couples therapy because they quickly lead to the breakdown of a relationship.
Read MoreThe discovery of an affair is gut wrenching. For many the pain and betrayal is too much to overcome and the relationship will never fully recover. However, relationship researchers like John Gottman and Esther Perel have found that an affair doesn’t always need to be the nail in the coffin. In fact, many of my couples have used the affair experience as a catalyst for improving and strengthening their relationship.
Read MoreRelationships are integral to life. Beginning in the womb, our lifeline is the umbilical cord attached to our mother. Once born, we scan for caregivers, crying for them and latching to them. As we grow we look for other people to accept and attach to us - friends, teachers, and strangers.
Read MoreEvery week I support client's that are struggling to manage a divorce, separation, or break up. My client's often feel very alone in their experience. However, I have found that most clients have common reactions at the end of their relationship.
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