Myth #2 Everything is 50/50

By Elizabeth Earnshaw

While it’s important for everyone to carry their weight, relationships can not be 50/50 at all times (or maybe ever at anytime). Trying to create absolute equality drives couples into disappointment, frustration, and anger. The thing is that every day will present challenges to both of you, individually and as a couple. People get sick, tired, or stressed. Sometimes one person is better at a task than the other. Responsibility will shift. Some days you’ll take on 80% and your partner 20%, some days it will be 40% on one end and 60% on the other. What’s important is the flexibility here. It’s not okay to feel that you’re always taking 80 percent while your partner takes 20 percent. But, if you can look at the whole of your relationship and see that you’re both willing to jump in for each other when needed, then you know you have a good thing. How do you and your partner manage tasks in a high stress world? 

Elizabeth Earnshaw, LMFT is a marriage therapist in Philadelphia, PA. Elizabeth supports individuals and couples to build meaningful and happy relationships.