Dear Hurting Couple

Dear Hurting Couple,

If your trust has been broken here is what you need:

The one that broke the trust needs to listen. Again and again. To show empathy. To say you understand, full heartedly, the impact of your actions. Because, how can anyone trust you if you can't say you know what you did? You also need to offer trust building behaviors - "here are the things I can do for you to make you feel safe again:" The one that's been "betrayed" might feel like there isn't much they can do. But, there is. You must shift your focus from punishment to healing. Your requests should be about building trust, having our pain heard, and moving forward - rather than punishment and shaming. You both need to be willing to feel all the feelings. To commit. To be willing to believe that things can get better. If one or both of you cannot do these things, then you cannot rebuild trust. But if you can, then there is certainly hope. I've seen it time and time again. 

Philly couples therapist

Elizabeth is a licensed Marriage and Family therapist in Philadelphia, PA. She support individuals to managing challenging relationships and to heal after the loss of breakup. She helps couples build the tools they need to love each other they way the intended. Elizabeth offers therapy in office and online and also has several home study programs.