Ask the Expert: Bringing Mindfulness into Your Relationship

Each week, we share posts in our #asktheexpert series.

Experts weigh in on issues that interest couples most.

This week, Carly, (our very own holistic therapist) is discussing how mindfulness can be used in your relationship to strengthen connection. Terms like "meditation", "breathing", somatic experiencing", these may sound like individual work. And it all can be! However, have you considered using these tools to help heal your romantic relationships? Think about the way you and your partner communicate. Is it loud? Argumentative? Inconsistent? I love working with couples on bringing themselves mindfully into their relationship. This can achieve greater synchronicity, calm, and clarity WITH one another, and lead to deeper understanding OF each other. Consider your most recent fight. Or bump along the way. Until we can learn to navigate conflict constructively, our nervous system take a hard hit. Verbal escalation can actually trigger physiological pain or fear. We get sent into survival mode. Quickened heart rates, heightened blood pressure, a shorter fuse. We get thrown off our point of safety, and it may manifest into symptoms of anxiety, depression, or mistrust. Tools such as breath exercises, shared meditations, and even mindful touch, can help improve you and your partner's ability for relaxation, sleep, and (when mutually consented to), rich intimacy and pleasure. Discover these simple ways to help self-regulate your autonomic nervous system, and access bodily safety in its preferred state of "rest and digest". For your thoughts, your emotions, and your actions - your relationship is worth the practice! 

Therapy Philadelphia

Carly McDade, LMFT is a licensed therapist in Philadelphia, PA. Carly can be found on instagram @embodyedtides. Carly supports couples and women to expand their awareness to manage physical and emotional pain. On top of being a licensed therapist, Carly is also a yoga teacher and trained in Reiki. Because of this, she has a full understanding of the mind and body connection.