When Therapy Needs a Twist: Navigating the Conversation with Your Couples Therapist

Therapy can be a powerful tool for enhancing relationships, but what happens when you feel like it's not working for you and your partner? It's essential to recognize when therapy needs a twist and explore other avenues for support. In this lighthearted blog, we'll guide you through the process of communicating with your couples therapist about your changing needs and finding different ways to seek the help you require.

Honesty is the Best Policy
- When it comes to addressing the effectiveness of therapy, honesty truly is the best policy. Remember, therapists are professionals who are committed to helping their clients. Be open and transparent about your concerns and feelings regarding the therapy process. By sharing your thoughts, you're giving your therapist an opportunity to adjust their approach or suggest alternative options.
Reflect on Your Experience
- Before discussing your concerns with your therapist, take some time to reflect on your therapy experience so far. Identify the specific aspects that haven't been as helpful or effective as you had hoped. Is it a mismatch in communication styles, a lack of progress, or a feeling of disconnection? Understanding the reasons behind your dissatisfaction will enable you to express them more clearly.
Be Specific and Concrete
- When conveying your need for different help and exploring other options, be specific and concrete. Explain the areas where you feel therapy has fallen short and why you believe alternative approaches may be more beneficial for you as a couple. By offering specific examples and solutions, you can work together with your therapist to find a way forward.
Request a Collaborative Approach
- Instead of abruptly discontinuing therapy, consider requesting a collaborative approach with your couples therapist. Ask if they can provide referrals or recommendations for other professionals or resources that may better suit your needs. This way, you're acknowledging their expertise while also paving the way for a smoother transition to a different form of assistance.
Explore Different Avenues
- Remember that therapy comes in various forms, and what works for one couple may not work for another. After discussing your concerns with your therapist, explore different avenues of support that align with your needs. This could be individual therapy, group therapy, relationship workshops, self-help books, or even online courses specifically targeting your relationship concerns.
Embrace the Learning Experience
- Even if therapy hasn't been as effective as you had hoped, embrace the experience as a learning opportunity. Reflect on what you have gained from therapy, both individually and as a couple. Recognize any progress or insights that have been beneficial along the way. This perspective will help you approach future endeavors with an open mind and a readiness to grow.

Written by: Eman Almusawi, LMFT

Eman Almusawi is a licensed marriage and family therapist in Pennsylvania. Eman practices from her office in the heart of New Hope, Pennsylvania and via telehealth. Her specialities include affairs, parenting, and trauma. You can read more about Eman here.

Schedule with Eman 24/7 using our online scheduling system.

A Better Life Therapy

A Better Life Therapy was founded in 2013 with a passion for providing warm, compassionate services to individuals and families in Pennsylvania. Our team specializes in relationship health as well as individual mental health. Our team has expertise in areas like anxiety, grief, depression, pregnancy related issues, sexual issues, substance use and trauma.

We currently have in person offices in: